I could've killed you
by Blackslik
Summary: The Reagan brothers are involved in a car crash, in their recovery they begin to realize how great the meaning of family really is.
1. Chapter 1

The day Jamie had been waiting for was finally here, his first NFL Game and what really made it sweet was his two older brothers were taking him, he already planned out his outfit, it was going to wear his number 84 Fred Baxter Jersey with jeans and his converses.

"Okay, Bye mom!" fifth-teen year old Jamie Reagan yelled running down the steps.

"You guys are off so soon." Mary poked her head out from the kitchen.

"We'll we have to pick up a few things before the game." Danny added.

"I call shotgun!" Jamie yelled, referring to the passenger front seat.

"Nope."

"Why not!" Jamie whined.

"Because i'm older." Danny laughed.

"Joe! Come on." Jamie looked at him, it was Joe's car after all.

"That between you two." Joe didn't want to play sides.

"Alright you three, get going you don't want to miss the game." The three boys kissed their mother goodbye and was on the road to East Rutherford, New jersey where Metlife stadium was located home of the New York Jets. The whole ride there the three went on and on about how good the game was going to be, when they arrived to the stadium it was the average tailgating, food drinks crazy friends, the three brother have been planing this for a while now, just to get out of the city and enjoy their favorite team on NFL sunday. After the Game it was hectic, Jets fans were pumped by the blowout win against Raiders. The car ride home was filled with laughter and talks about the game.

"Fred baxter had three touchdowns and four interceptions, the guy's a beast." Jamie went on.

"Yeah makes me miss my football days." Danny added.

"What football days?" Joe and Jamie chuckled.

"Senior year when i took my team to state and what are you laughing at golden boy, you're playing baseball."

"Pro and high school are two different things and What's wrong with baseball?" Jamie was offended.

"Yeah what's wrong with baseball." Joe repeated in Jamie's defense, Danny rolled his eyes, Joe always took Jamie's side.

"Did i say anything was wrong with-" Danny paused seeing a grey SUV out of the corner of his eye, coming through the intersection when they had the Green light neither brother had time to brace for impact as the speeding SUV slammed into the right side of the car, the SUV hit little more towards the back seat where Jamie sat, The car spinned around twice.

Moment or minutes later he had no idea, Joe woke to the sound of a car horn blaring out, He struggled to open his eyes and found his head resting on the steering wheel, realising he tried to lift his head to make the noise stop. He was relieved when it stopped but now it was replaced with his head feeling like it was about to explode and the effort of trying to keep his head up. He was wondering if it would be easier to rest his head on the steering wheel and try and ignore the deafening tones of the horn, or try and stay how he was when he realised where he was and what had just happened, he knew he had to lift his head, he had to check on Danny and Jamie. He tried to move but a sharp pain pounded through his neck causing him to take a sharp intake of breath and close his eyes again. It took a couple of minutes but he slowly managed to open his eyes again, the need to check on Danny and Jamie overrode the pain he was feeling and he knew had to try and angle his eyes in a way he didn't think possible to avoid moving his neck anymore so as he could look to his right to check on Siblings. He managed to get just a glimpse of him before he couldn't hold his head up any longer, he looked back, Danny looked to be waking up while Jamie was unconscious his head was back against the seat at an awkward angle and there blood covering his face, his dirty blonde hair now dark. Joe's older brother instincts wanted to kick in, he wanted to help baby brother and make sure he was alive, but he just couldn't keep his head up any longer, and the steering wheel looked like the most appealing place to just lean his head on for two minutes,

"Danny! Jamie!" all Joe could do was scream for his Brothers he leant his head down carefully, he closed his eyes tightly on hearing the sound of the horn again, but as the pain from his neck overrode everything else, he relaxed into the darkness that seemed to cover him.

* * *

"Mr. Reagan.. Mr. Reagan." everything was blurry at first and his surroundings completely unfamiliar as was the voice.

"What wh." Danny's eyes began to focus. He did a brief look around the room, he saw monitors, a man in a white coat and Erin, Mary and Frank in the corner all arm in arm. Their eyes were red glazed as if they had been crying. He looked down at his arm and seen a tub like thing going into it.

"What's happened." Danny was terrified.

"You don't remember?" Mary was shocked.

"No i, um."

"You were on your way home from the Jets game and you were in a serious car accident. You broke your left leg " The doctor reminded.

"Jets game? Car accident?" Danny's eyes widened with fear. He tried to sit up put a sharp pain struck in his leg. "Where's Joe and Ja Jamie." Erin spun around, into her father's shoulder.

"I'll be outside, let me know if you need anything." the doctor didn't want to be all in their conversation.

"Joe woke up a day after the accident." Danny was confused at his mother's words.

"A day? so what's today?" Danny didn't understand.

"It's day three."

"Day three?!" Danny yelled. "I've been unconscious for three days?" Mary nodded, water filling her eyes.

"Jamie… Where is he, how is ." Danny couldn't even finish.

"Jamie's in critical condition, he um." Frank coughed trying to clear his throat. "He had internal bleeding, and a punctured lung that they had to re inflate, and his ribs are cracked and he's got a bruised brain, they put him into a medically induced coma, he's in ICU they say the next twenty four to forty eight hours are crucial." Danny saw the pain in his father's eyes, Tears poured down Danny's face.

"Why-" Mary walked over to her oldest son and grabbed his hand.

"I need you to be strong, okay? and if you can't for yourself i need you to be for Jamie and Joe." she tightly squeezed his hand, locked in deep eye contact Danny nodded.

"How is Joe, how is he taking this." Danny asked.

"He's asleep right now but not well at all, he won't say anything really he blames himself for something he had no control over." Erin Replied.

"Do you think we can share a room? i don't want him to be alone anymore." Danny eyes begged.

"Me and your father will speak with the staff." Mary released her grip on his hand, the two left the room leaving Danny and Erin.

"I'm sorry sis." Danny broke.

"What are you sorry for?" Erin whipped her eyes.

"For scaring you. I know you felt like you were going to lose all three of us and i'm sorry." Danny reached his hand out for hers.

"I'll be fine, i love you, i love all of you." she squeezed his hand.

 **TBC i will update like ASAP! please review and like, first fic, take it easy on me.**


	2. Chapter 2

Three knocks heard from the front door, interrupting the Jets game, for Frank, Henry and his two sons, Joe and Danny sat staring around wondering who it could be.

"Erin?" Frank asked getting up walking to the door.

"I don't think so, Nikki is sick so she's staying home she said," Danny answered. Frank peeked through the peephole, his eyes widened.

"Jamie!" His father shouted. Joe and Danny rushed to the front door.

"J!" Joe shouted as well hugging his brother right after their father. "What are you doing home, I thought you weren't gonna be back for another two weeks!"

"See, I was but I passed my finals so I didn't have to stay longer, I'm home for the summer."

"You passed two weeks early? either Harvard is too easy or you're just a genius" Joe laughed.

"Something like that." Jamie laughed back, he stared at the only person in his view he had yet to greet.

"It's good to see you kid, it's been a while." they all thought back 13 months ago when their mother passed away. Jamie had been home twice since then for the funeral and to visit his mother's grave and check in on their father, but he hadn't seen Danny since the funeral.

"I've missed you, Danny," Jamie said. Ever since Jamie entered high school he and Danny had broken apart, they had different views on things, the brothers who were first best friends had become strangers, their father and the rest of the family had thought it would go away as Jamie went through high school, and even after he graduated high school and left for college they grew even further apart, their mother's death didn't even bring them closer, Joe would always be the one to call Jamie and they would talk for hours but he rarely received any calls from Danny.

"Hey, Jamie." Henry made his way over from the living room.

"Hey pops." Jamie smiled.

"You've gotten taller?" Henry squinted.

"Oh I don't know, pops have I.?" Jamie held his hand up to the top of his head trying to see the height difference from him and Joe.

"Woah, Woah, kid you're not there yet." Joe lowered Jamie's hand.

"Get in here and close the door." Henry scolded the men. Jamie headed up to his old room, he laid his bag down on the floor, he took in the sights of his old room, he gazed at all the trophies he had on the wall from little league to his high school days, he looked on his desk table and found a picture of him and his mother, the day of his high school graduation, 'I looked so happy then.' he thought to himself sadly. He just held the picture in his hand staring. Joe did his special knock on the door breaking Jamie's train of thought.

"You good?" Joe walked up to Jamie cautiously.

"Yeah, I'm good." Jamie smiled placing the picture back on his desk.

"Bring back any memories?" Joe smiled, looking around the room.

"Too many." Jamie slight smiled.

"So tell me, anything new with Harvard before you left?"

"No nothing really, just the regular dating or whatever, how's the job?"

"I left warrant squad and I'm now a homicide detective." Jamie's jaw dropped. He was eager to ask another question

"But I'll tell you about that later! What about that one girl you told me about? what was her name?"

"Eddie. she doesn't go to Harvard, she lives in Boston though."

"Same thing, how're things with her?"

"Good, we talk here and there and go on dates but nothing serious as of right now," Jamie said blandly laying onto the bed. "What about you? How's Angela."

"Great... I'm in love with that girl." Jamie's eyes widened at his words. "I might propose, but is it too soon?"

"You guys have been together for two years, that's pretty long, plus mom was crazy about her too, they got along really good, that should tell you something," Jamie said staring at the ceiling. Joe's eyes widened, he stood over Jamie with a goofy look on his face. Jamie sat up looking at him weirdly.

"You're right kid." Joe smiled.

"Yeah okay don't be so weird." Jamie laughed lightly "Imma shower before I eat, that was a four-hour drive."

"Alright, but I got a new exhaust in the Chevelle, check it out?"

"Duh." Jamie was just as crazy about the car as he was.

"Cool, also you want to visit mom tomorrow?"

"I'd love that." Jamie smiled.

Hours had passed and Jamie had yet to come downstairs, "Jamie is here and has yet to come to hang out with us." Danny mentioned, stopping the conversation between his brother, father, and grandfather

"I know.," Joe remembered, Danny headed upstairs to find Jamie in the dark slumped in his bed snoring.

"You okay kid." Danny gently nudged him.

"Hmm." Jamie wiped his eyes. "Danny? what time is it?"

Danny looked at his watch."7:30 pm."

"I slept for three hours?" Jamie said in shock.

"Yeah kid and you missed the game, the Jets beat the Broncos."

"Why didn't you wake me up."

"I just woke you up," Danny replied.

"Jamie rolled his eyes. "I meant earlier!"

"Joe mentioned the drive down was long so we wouldn't bother you for a while, so meet us all downstairs" Danny closed the door behind him. Ten minutes after Danny had gone downstairs, Jamie finally came downstairs

"Good morning, J." Joe joked.

"Your plate is in the microwave," Henry mentioned.

"Thanks pops, Imma check out Joe's car first." Jamie put his shoes on.

"I'll check it out with you?" Joe began to stand up.

"You don't have too, you guys are talking, I'll just take it for a test drive around the neighborhood, come out when I get back."

"Don't scratch her please." Joe sat back into his seat.

"Don't worry," Jamie snatch the car keys from the counter.

* * *

"Is that him?" The man spoke into the radio.

"Male, dark blonde hair, around six feet tall." another man radio in.

"Perfect match to a T, the boss wants this done today! make it quick, kill him." The man in the back seat lowered his head turning his radio completely off.

* * *

Jamie unlocked the Chevelle, taking in the exterior of the car, the car was a true hot rod. He placed the keys in the ignition, turned the engine on and flipping the lights on he felt a sharp an unbearable pain in his back. Jamie looked around to see what caused this agonizing pain, but as soon as he did another sharp pain entered his body. Jamie gasped in pain. What the hell was behind him? And while he was trying to figure that out a dark and low male voice spoke.

"Reagans… you make me sick... you're dead." The man stabbed with his 9-inch knife in a complete rage. Over and over in Jamie's back, right through his brother's car seat, with his final stab, he said, "If only you weren't who you are." and twisted the blade, poked a little and pulled it out. Wiping the blade clean on his jeans. He pushed the passenger's seat forward, reached to grab the car keys and turned the engine off. He climbed out of the car. Leaving Jamie behind. Bleeding heavily, all over the seat. His shirt was soaking up the blood. Jamie groan in pain turned into a cough, blood was coming out of his mouth. He gasped for air.

Jamie wrapped his right arm around his stomach as the passenger's door closed. The only thing that came to his mind was the fact that Joe asked that he wouldn't put a scratch on it, how could he explain this? Crazy right?. He was dying and all he could think the Chevelle being stained with blood.

"One thing I will get, I want a new engine, I don't need it anytime soon though," Joe mentioned to his father.

"Speaking of the car, is the kid back yet? Danny asked. Joe stood up peeking through the blinds at the spot where he had left his car.

"Yeah, he's right outside." Joe put his shoes on walking down the driveway.

"What do you think!" Joe shouted from the driveway as he walked down.

A wave of pain brought his thoughts back to reality. He heard something. He was trying to breathe, slowly and controlled, in and out but it didn't seem to help.

"Come on I'm eager here!" There was that sound again, Jamie thought. Joe walked up to the car It was dark but he could vaguely see Jamie sitting on the driver's side.

"Quit ignoring me J!" Joe said he was too excited, as he opened the passenger's door. Joe shot a look over at Jamie. All of a sudden his world stopped and his stomach turned around. "Jamie!? Jamie!?" Joe screamed, he was completely in shock at the sight of his little brother, sitting unconscious in his car seat. Jamie's shirt soaked in blood. His chin touching his chest, his left arm wrapped around his stomach and blood was dripping from the corner of his mouth.

"Jamie?" Joe panicked. Danny and Frank rushed out of the house, Henry right behind.

"What's up Joe?" Danny ran up to Joe's side, stuck at the site of his baby brother.

"Dad! call 9-11!" Danny screamed. Henry ran inside and grabbed the phone when he returned he had already started the phone call.

"She said what are his injuries?" Henry said frantically looking over at Jamie. Frank stood there in pure shock all the blood, it was a scene from a horror movie.

"I… um I don't know." Joe glanced at Jamie trying to figure out where the blood was coming from. "He is bleeding heavily!"

"Does he have a pulse?" Henry repeating her words.

'God, why didn't I check?' Joe placed his shaky index and middle fingers on Jamie's neck, in the soft hollow area. 'Come on Jamie, please…' Joe prayed.

"Yes! yeah! he has a pulse! it's weak but it is there" Joe sighed with relief. He was alive, thank god.

"The paramedics are on route, They'll be here in 3 minutes!" Henry shouted.

"Hey, hey, hey," Danny said softly and full of emotion, going on the other side to open the driver side, "Jamie, kid, you're going to be okay, can you hear me? kid." Joe kept his finger on his pulse. "Stay with us Jamie, hey kid do you hear me? you're not going to die." Danny said tears streaming down his face.

"Oh god," Joe said to shouted. "His shirt is covered with cuts and blood oozing out of his body!" Frank took his own button up off, leaving him in a white t-shirt, leaning Jamie on the steering wheel, putting his shirt on some wounds and placed Jamie carefully against his car seat. Frank whipped his hands clean on his white t-shirt.

"My god Jamie, who did this?" Of course, he didn't get an answer from his son, but it was a rhetorical question anyway. The Reagan's could hear sirens coming closer. Henry stood weaving his arms in the air so they could see where they had to go.

The ambulance pulled up in front of the Chevelle. The doors went open, one woman came out rushing towards the vehicle, and the other one grabbed a backboard and a bag full of medical stuff.

"What's going on?" she asked as he jogged towards Frank and Danny stepped out of the way so she could see Jamie sitting unconscious in the driver's seat, Joe's hand still on his pulse.

"My Son, he, he, had to of been stabbed! we found him like this! he is unconscious. He's wheezing and his heart rate is weak but there." Frank explained

"Let's get him ready for transport!" the other three medics worked quickly.

"Okay, let's put a collar on his neck there might be a spinal injury. So let's move quickly but gentle, get an IV line started and push 10 of morphine." The medic placed the collar on Jamie's neck, put an air mask over his mouth and checked for breathing sounds, while also starting the IV line.

The family watched the medics gently pull Jamie from the car and how they placed the backboard underneath Jamie and moved Jamie right side. The female eyes immediately widened. The medic packed the wounds with some trauma pads to secure the wounds and stop the bleeding. As soon as she packed the wounds, they turned Jamie carefully on his back. The other medic took the oxygen mask off Jamie's mouth and started to intubate.

"Sir, are you okay?" Pointed out Joe's clothes, completely bloodied.

"Not mine" Joe responded looking down at his shirt. Jamie was intubated the two medics calmly nodded and together they pulled the backboard up and placed it on the stretcher. Joe slammed the Chevelle door,

"Dad please go with him we'll be at Queen's medical center ASAP," Frank jumped in the backdoors of the ambulance, they sped away, the sirens full throttle.

Joe watched as the ambulance drove out of sight, he looked down at his clothes then inside of his car, the police sirens and streetlights making the blood more visible. He stomach crunched and he ran over to the sidewalk and let it all out, he tried his best to keep the throw up from landing on the sidewalk inside he tried for the grass but on his hands and knees, he did the best he could.

"Joe..." Danny walked up to him gauging his full outfit, he was covered in Jamie's blood. Joe yelled like he was in pain, he was still in his hands and knees hovering over his throw up.

"Fucking how! How does this shit happen!" Joe screamed. Their close neighbors were already outside covered in a group on the other side of the street watching.

"Come on Joe.." Danny said just as emotional, Joe turned his head a little bit looking at Danny. Danny took a step back, Joe had never had that kind of regret or anger in his eyes for as long as Danny had known him. Joe stood up, walking into the house, he needed a fresh shirt.

"Commissioner Reagan." The detective greeted.

"Ex-Commissioner."

"Do you think we can have a statement on what happened so we can get this investigation on the road."

"Please at the hospital my grandson was damn near butchered."

"Right, I completely understand will finish up here, I'll be by the hospital later." The detective nodded.

* * *

They were only a minute away from the hospital but it felt like an hour Frank took Jamie's hand and looked at him. He didn't even look like Jamie anymore. He was pale and vulnerable. Who would do this to his son, his baby boy? he couldn't think of anyone who would do this to Jamie. Someone stabbed him from behind with a knife. That's something personal.

They arrived at the Queen's Medical Center. The ambulance doors were pulled open and they unloaded the stretcher, rolling it to the doctors the head paramedic began.

"Jameson Reagan, 21 years, unconscious, multiple stab wounds in his back, no breath sounds on the right, possible spinal injury and lost a lot of blood, BP is 90 over 50"

"Thank you we got him from here. Let's flip him on his right side, get an x-ray, started with a chest tube and let's get him on a blood transfusion. Hang two bags of O-neg please." Frank was walking fast to keep up with them as they wheeled Jamie beyond the double doors.

"I'm doctor Mcpartlin and I will do everything I can for your son commissioner but you'll need to leave so we can work. I will give you an update as soon as I can." the doctors ran off.

And the wait has begun...

* * *

 **TBC!**

 **Stay tuned! like and review! I love suggestions**


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm going to speak with him." Mary made the first move.

"Lets all just go to him." Danny suggested.

"All? Danny you can't walk." Henry reminded him staring down at his cast on his leg.

"Get me a wheelchair, He'll need to see all of us together and we can explain. Please let me do this." Danny begged.

"Well what about your IV."

"That can be wheeled." A familiar female voice said from the doorway.

"Linda?" Danny eyes widened with joy. "What are you doing back from Uganda so soon?" Linda had been in Uganda providing aid to the villages there for the past few weeks.

"I got the message your mom sent the day of the accident yesterday. Communication isn't really good out there. I hopped on a plane hours later and here i am." She walked over to hugged Danny.

"You didn't tell me you contacted Linda." Danny was so grateful for his mother. All Mary did was smile. Even if Mary hadn't Linda, Linda could have learned through the news. The accident was in a couple of news cycles.

"How's Jamie and Joe." Linda worried. They explained both of their traumas and the situation they're in about Joe to her.

"Oh gosh." Linda sat down, her heart hurt for them she met Jamie when he was only six years old and met Joe when he was ten years old when her and Danny were sixteen years old, she even remembers going with Danny after high school to pick up Joe and Jamie from school. So as an RN she deeply understands severeness of their injuries.

"Well if it's okay I think we should inform the doctor about Danny, let's see if he can leave the bed for a little while." Mary and Frank stood out in the hall and spoke with the doctor, Joe's room was on the same floor but down the hallway so the doctor didn't have a problem so he came in and evaluated Danny.

"You think I can doc?" Danny asked when the doctor removed the light from his eyes.

"It'll be okay, you needed to move around a bit anyways to avoid blood clots. I'll also will be getting your discharge papers together, Your scans came back great and you should be ready to go." Relief rang around the room. The doctor called for the nurse to bring in a wheelchair.

"I'll head up and be with Jamie." Henry volunteered.

"That'll be nice." Since Henry wasn't present in the conversation between Frank, Mary, Erin and Danny and Jamie did need a presences around. After Henry made his departure and They settled Danny the wheelchair, Standing up for the first time in 3 days was a struggle, Danny was still very sore and standing on one leg didn't help much either. They watched the winced on Danny's face.

"Are you okay?" Erin asked unsure of this was a good idea. Danny nodded, trying to find a comfortable position in the chair.

"Soreness is normal, I did just give you a dose of pain medicine that should kick in a few moments." The doctor added. The family thanked the doctor and made their way down the hallway, entering Joe's room they seen her was surrounded by men and women in blue, each one from the 12th.

"Renzulli." Frank shook his hand along with the others from the 12th. Joe just sat and watched his family come in one by one last to enter the simi packed room was Danny being wheeled in by Linda, Joe's eyes widened, the first time seeing his brother since he blacked out in the car.

"Reagan!" Rang out from all of the officers.

"Alright Joe we'll come back and visit soon. Miss walking the beat with you." Joe smiled a bit the men and women knew it was time to leave. They said their goodbyes to Joe and the family and expressed their sympathies and well wishes for the youngest and even left more flowers and cards next to Joe's for Jamie.

"Danny.." All Joe could get out. Linda wheeled Danny closer to Joe. Danny grabbed Joe's hand that wasn't in a sling. "I-"

"I love you Joe." Danny got it out first. Mary eyes began watering.

"Your leg." Joe looked down at the cast. Feeling even more remorseful.

"Hey don't worry about that, I'm being discharged today. I'm okay and I really want you to know none of this was your fault." Danny had a serious look on his face looking Joe in the eye.

"Alright Danny." Joe's responds not very confident.

"I'm sorry Joe." Erin apologized. Joe looked away from his other family members still upset with them.

"I want you all to tell me the truth, i deserve the whole truth." Joe was firm.

"You do." Frank spoke.

"We just wanted to protect you but instead we hurt you and we're so, so sorry." Mary came to his side.

"That was never our intent at all Joey, we're sorry and we are ready to tell you the truth if you're ready to hear it." Erin said nervously playing with her hands.

"I accept your apologies and I am ready to hear it. I wanna hear it all." Joe used his good arm to sit up more.

"But." Frank voice boomed. "You must remain seated." Joe was embarrassed from what happened earlier but he nodded.

"Jamie's had two surgerys." Joe kept his eye contact with his father. "Also had internal bleeding, but it's under control, nearly gone now. He had some cracked ribs and one of them punctured his lung, so he has a chest tube." Frank stopped to look at Joe's and gauged his reaction. Joe was staring straight into Frank's eyes.

"Carry on," Everyone could sense the pain in his voice, Jamie and Joe were so close, They couldn't deny Joe anymore information when they knew he would just worry about it and do himself more damage trying to find out more information. Frank hoped if they were honest with him now, Joe would listen to them later when he undoubtedly wanted to see Jamie before Joe was ready to get out of bed.

"He has a bruised and swollen brain," Everyone tensed up looking straight at Joe. "Right now he's on a ventilator, he can't breathe on his own yet. And because of his brain injury they placed him in a medically induced coma." Before Joe could say anything Frank carried on "But the CT yesterday show the swelling has gone down alot and that he can come off the ventilator, possibly even tomorrow, Thursday the latest." Frank finished.

Joe leant back into the pillow, his eyes scrunched up in pain, keeping deep direct eye contacted for that length of time had made the room spin and his head pound, but he wasn't going to reacted how he wanted to but he promised, he wouldn't. Joe opened his eyes after taking in all that information.

"That's a great sign Joey he'll be able to wake up in no time." Erin tried to cheer him up.

"Pop's with him now?" Joe trembled.

"He is." Mary confirmed.

"Okay." Joe felt even worse, but he needed to know.

"But i heard you might be discharged tomorrow." Erin tried to say something positive.

"Yeah." Joe said in a low tone. "Um- I don't mean to be rude or anything but can you guys go? I'm just tired." They were shocked with what he had just asked.

"O-okay sweetie." Mary didn't really know how to react, they told Joe they loved him and all departed the room. Half way down the hall.

"I felt he would do that." Frank said.

"Maybe that was a lot to lay on him at once." Mary added.

"He needed to hear and was going to learn about it away ways. But him dismissing us was a shock."

"You think someone should have stayed?" Danny thought.

"No, no, he wouldn't want that." Frank reminded them. Entering Danny's room again the family helped Danny back into the bed. Danny and Joe shared the same Doctor and he entered the room followed by a nurse and another woman not in nurse attire.

"Doctor Erickson." Mary greeted him.

"Hello everyone, I have great news I received Danny's and Joe's scans, they both look fantastic Danny will be discharged by later tonight, Possibly even Joe." Linda squeezed Danny shoulder.

"That's great doc." Danny expressed happily "But what do you mean 'Possibly Joe' Joe's scans were fantastic to right?" The doctor sighed a little bit.

"Yes his scans looked great and he's great physically but mentally not so much."

"What do you mean." Mary nervously said.

"He is struggling mentally with all this and he's not receiving the right amount of sleep like and nutrition like he should."

"Maybe he's was trying to morn like trying to cope." Erin suggested nervously.

"He's not eating enough or not at all and from all the test i've seen i'm sure he's suffering from excessive guilt."

"Excessive guilt?" nearly all in the room repeated.

"Yes and I brought in a Social Psychologist to walk you through everything and she'll evaluate Joe and if she can confirm his mental health is where it should be he can be released as early as tomorrow morning." The Lady stepped forward.

"Hello, my name is Angela Ferraro, I work with hospitals all around the five boroughs to help identify a patient's mental health or disorders. Excessive guilt is a form of depression it happens when people are involved in incidents they can't control and have remorseful thoughts and extreme guilt over something that wasn't their fault. I understand the Joe, you and your little brother were involved in a car accident a few days ago." The Reagan's confirmed. "And it's just that an accident but Joe doesn't see it that way and possible won't for awhile and found to be very common in patients who have been in car accidents, shootings or even lost a relative. I interact with patients and a lot of the common signs and symptoms of excessive guilt is just as Doctor Erickson mentioned, lack of appetite and sleep, having outburst that they usually don't do or haven't at all before." Erin's eyes widened. "Consistently being apologetic, nightmares and distancing themselves from others with the excuses that their tired and don't feel well or maybe don't want to be bothered at all."

"So similar to a personality disorder?" Linda wondered. Angela was surprised. "Sorry RN at St. Victors."

"Yes actually very much so but I wouldn't be able to diagnose that until I had a full evaluation of the patient." Angela expressed.

"That would explain how he kicked us out saying he was he was 'tired'" Mary quaked.

"And him yelling and trying to get out of bed. That was strange coming from him." Erin pointed out.

"The apologizing," Frank pointed out.

"Come on guys, this is Joe we're talking about he's doesn't have a personality disorder." Danny was in denial.

"She didn't say it was a personality disorder Danny." Linda scolded.

"He didn't say anything about nightmares and that could explain why he hasn't slept like Dr. Erickson said." Mary added.

"So when will you see him."

"He has his mother and father as his next of kin, i'll just need a signature to get started." Angela held out her clip board.

"I thought next of kins only worked when a persons dead or unable to make a decision from themselves?" Erin was confused.

"Not the case with potential mental patients. Those who are suffering from some sort of disorder don't typically agree to be mentally evaluated. Their usually in denial of their own health." Erin nodded that makes sense. Mary signed the dotted line after reading the what will happen in and after the evaluation.

"Okay." Angela shook all of their hands and departed the room. Dr Erickson had Danny's discharge papers in hand.

"You ready Mr. Reagan."

"Yes," Danny signed the paper quickly. The doctor chuckled a bit and handed him a prescription for the pain meds he'll need and said his goodbye to Danny.

"I'm going to head up to the ICU, did you want to come along?" Mary invited Danny, Danny hadn't laid eyes on his little brother since getting in the car outside of metlife stadium. Danny nervously nodded, ready to see.

"But what about Joe." Danny had to mention.

"He's with the Psychologist, I read on the chart the evaluation will be no longer than an hour. If he does great he can come up and visit Jamie too." Mary responded.

"O-okay." Danny hesitant and his father noticed.

"Danny. It'll be okay." His father assured him. Danny gave his father a nodded that he's ready to go.

When they arrived on the floor, Danny noticed the surroundings being very different from the floor him and Joe. The large banner on the wall read 'UCI' the reality terrified Danny. When he was finally outside of room 571 his heart pounded like a drum and his palms became sweety.

"You okay honey." Linda asked.

"Yeah let me in." Frank turned the handle. Linda rolled Danny in he had seen his Grandfather seated at the chair beside the bed. But when he laid eyes on Jamie his heartbroken in half completely loud breaths heard from him. His eyes examined the the long tube that was going into his mouth, he noticed a small scabbing cut above his right eye, presumably from the glass on impact also a purple/blue bruise on his cheekbone, he seen the bandaged like headband wrapped around his head and his hair looked darker and he knew it had to be because of the blood.

"You wanna get closer?" Linda asked. Danny couldn't speak so all he did was nod. Linda wheeled him to the other side of the bed where no one sat, Linda then returned to the spot the rest of the family stood. Danny was about to take his hand but noticed a finger clip on his index finger attached to a wire that led to a monitor, so Danny gently touched his three free fingers, Danny's hand shook like a tree in the wind.

"You know you can talk to him." Henry suggested. Danny nodded not at sure what to say.

* * *

"So you're like a shrink." Joe said in a rude way even after she introduced herself to him. Angela had be asking Joe his personal likes and preferences for over 20 minutes.

"That's not the word for it but sure," Angela stayed calm.

"You guys think I'm crazy in here." Joe spat. "Unbelievable."

"No one thinks that Joe." Angela reminded him.

"Really because they must or i'm sitting here with you for no reason." Joe attitude was ignorant.

"No, we're here to find out why you haven't been sleeping, eating, not acting yourself and-"

"Tragedy affects people in different ways," Joe interrupted.

"-Having nightmares." Joe eyes widened at the last part.

"How'd you know about my nightmares."

"I've been a medical professional for a little over four years, i know things." Joe nodded impressed. What are your nightmares about?"

"Things." Joe was vague.

"Like?"

"I don't know you and you don't know me but you want me to open up to you about my struggles?" Joe was skeptical.

"Everything we speak about will be totally confidential and will stay here in this room. I'm here to help you and I can't when you won't let me." Joe closed his eyes and let out a long sigh.

"About the crash, What i seen."Joe took a brief pause. "It haunts me." Joe got out. Angela took notes.

"Okay, you think you can tell me what that is you saw?" Joe stared at the wall for a while he began shaking his head.

"I really can't, I'm sorry." Joe facial expression said it all.

"You can, you're doing so well." Angela encouraged.

"When it happened I really don't remember the impact but when I woke up, I was in pain and the horn was blasting, I was in so much pain I could barely hold up my head to make it stop, so I laid there for a while and after that, it took all my strength I had to get my head up and check on my brothers, I seen Danny, he was in the passenger seat, he was um, unconscious, waking up i think. Then I looked over at Jamie," Joe stopped, a knot stuck in his throat. Angela put her hand onto his for comfort. "His head was at this awkward angle and blood covered his face like a mask and my head could hold no longer, the pain engulfed me and I blacked out. I always think and dream that when I fall asleep that they would have died and I just can't eat."

"But they didn't die Joe."

"I've held Jamie in my arms the day he was born, we've played together, I've taken him to school I even beat up kids who tried to bully him" Joe smiled a bit with that memory. "But it's so hard to lose that imagine from my mind. I just- if I had lost him I would be a mess, I guess more of a mess and that goes for both of them."

"You can't live your life thinking of what could have happened as opposed to what did happen, no one blames you for what happened, bad things happen everyday to good people and I see it almost everyday when I get to work, but I want you to be able to go on with your life and that's exactly what your family wants for you too. This is a time for you guys to lean on each other to get passed this and heal, but you will be able to do so until you drop this guilt on your shoulders that shouldn't be there." Joe sat there for a while.

"You're right. I'm not reasonable." Joe got out, his eyes watering with relief hearing himself say it. Angela removed her hand from his, realizing it was a bit unprofessional.

"You're not." Angela assured him. Tears fell from his eyes, weight has fell off his shoulders. Angela showed him technics he can do if the guit returned, boxed breathing, little things to repeat to remind him it's not his fault.

"So what now?" Joe wondered.

"I'll get Doctor Erickson, I see no signs of any mental health problems, but you are grieving and coping in all the wrong ways but with the right guidance, possibility medication. It's something that can be fixed." Angela assured. "You'll be ready to be discharged in the morning." Joe was thankful.

"Thank you so much Ms. Ferraro, I apologize for my rudeness earlier, I haven't been myself for a while." Joe apologize was sincere.

"It's okay." Angela smiled, the two stuck in deep eye contact. It lasted for a few moments, Angela then looked away. "I'll um, i'll get the doctor." Angela quickly left the room, she reminded herself that he's her patient and it's unprofessional, but he was so handsome and his eyes and technically he's not her patient because no mental disorder found to be a factor and he is so- 'Stop it' she scolded herself. She carried on through the corridor in search of Doctor Erickson.

 **TBC!**

 _ **Thank you all for the reviews, really! they give me so much motivation to write more and update more often, next chapter will be in before Monday! Review please! Back to Jamie and the rest of the Reagan's next chapter.**_


	4. Chapter 4

Morning came. Last night Mary, Erin, Linda and Henry left after the ICU visiting hours were up at 10 pm, they returned home to get proper sleep, they begged Danny to go along but he was stubborn and unwilling, Frank and Danny headed back to Joe's floor, the recovery unit, it had 24 hour visitation. Mary, Henry and Linda were going to return sometime in the morning, Erin was going to head back to her law firm for her first day of work since the accident.

"Good morning." Doctor Erickson walked in. Danny and Frank sat up from the uncomfortable, sofa's that were in Joe's room.

"Doc do you ever go home and get rest?" Danny asked rubbing his eye.

"I can ask you the same, you were discharged yesterday but here you are." Dr Erickson looked over the papers on his clipboard "You should be home elevating your leg." Danny took the Doctor's advice as a suggestion. But Doctor Erickson knew their situation and said no more. "Great news Joseph, here are your discharge papers." Joe sat up a bit with a smile on his face.

"Joe got some rest last night." Frank smiled.

"Yeah." Joe smiled grabbing the clipboard, the things he learned from the psychologist helped a lot. "Wait I'm right handed." He looked down at his right arm in a sling.

"Just do your best with your left?" Frank suggested. Joe scribbled 'J-C-Reagan' to the best of his ability.

"You're free to go." Doctor Erickson shook his head, giving him prescriptions for the pain and for his guilt depression, which he had no desire taking.

"Here Joe." Danny tossed him a bag filled with clothes. Their mother packed them a bag filled with their clothes knowing they weren't leaving anytime soon. Joe was able to change into everything beside his shirt, Joe didn't ask but Frank helped him put on his shirt. His entire right side was sore so instead they just put his left arm in a sleeve hole and put his head through the head hole and left his right arm alone still in the sling. Joe sat back down in the bed, huffing and puffing as if he had just ran a marathon.

"You okay." Danny, examined his brother. Joe just nodded, that was his first physical activity in a long time.

"Yeah." The pain was obvious in his voice. Frank just sighed the pain his son's and family were in was senseless, a 59 year old lady caused his family this pain and the more he thought of it the angrier he became.

"You wanna head up to see Jamie?" Frank suggested to Joe.

"Yes." Joe answered immediately. The three were in route to the ICU, upon arrival to the 5th floor Joe felt a pit in his stomach, nearly identical to what Danny had felt the day before, his chest began to tighten and regret flooded his mind.

"Joe?" Frank noticed.

"I- i'm good just wait a sec." Frank came to a holt pushing Danny down the corridor. "Alright, let's go." reaching room 571, the three noticed the room door was already opened which was strange because Mary and the others hadn't arrived yet. Frank encountered Dr. Wilson coming out as he was going in.

"Is everything alright?" Frank asked Jamie's ICU, Doctor. nervously.

"Good Morning Mr. Reagan and absolutely, we actually just removed Jameson from the ventilator. The Reagan men eyes lit up.

"He'll wake up soon?" Joe asked. Dr. Wilson gave a confident smile.

"Just let me grab his latest charts and scans and I'll be right back." She made a quick departure.

"Let's go in." Frank gave a first real smile in days. Walking in Frank and Danny noticed the loud whooshing sound had disappeared as did the long tube down Jamie's throat. Though Frank and Danny had seen improvement Joe wasn't too sure. he noticed every detail about Jamie. From the white bandages wrapped around his head to the purple bruise on his cheek with the cut above it.

"Joe, this is good. Yesterday he was on the ventilator when I saw him." Danny said.

"I need to step and and call the family." Frank announced. Joe walked over and sat down at Jamie's bed side.

"He's lost weight." Joe noticed.

"Nothing he won't gain back in recovery." Danny reminded, praying Joe won't go back into his guilt depression. Joe grabbed Jamie's hand.

"Hey Jamie you can stop giving us the silent treatment now, Me, Danny and Dad are here, Mom and the others will be here soon so why don't you wake up for us?" He looked at Jamie's closed eyes intently, hoping to see just the slightest of flickers, but nothing. He sighed Danny rolled closer to him, placed his hand on his shoulder and squeezed it gently. Frank returned a short time after with Mary, Henry and Linda.

"Mom!" Joe called. He stood up and embraced his mother into a very tight hug one arm hug, a hug they both needed desperately.

"Oh Joey." She released from the hug. Walking over and hugging her oldest son as well. "My baby boy." She laid her eyes on Jamie, tears came to her eyes knowing he's at least able to breath on his own.

"Hello everyone." Dr. Wilson entered along with papers presumably Jamie's charts. She noticed a few fresh faces.

"Ms. Wilson." Mary greeted, she has became a familiar face to Mary over the past few days.

"I have reviewed Jamie's chart and everything so far looks great and as many of you noticed his ventilator has been removed. Although the road till he's 100% recovered his long I have no doubt in my mind it won't be impossible, also another great sign is his medically induced coma has been reversed his brain swelling has dropped tremendously and his internal bleeding is gone so now it's just a waiting game." She spoke to the large family, all the cards, teddy bears and balloons showed that Jamie is loved.

"When will he wake?" Frank asked the question on everyone's mind. Dr. Wilson sighed, which made their skin crawl, a sigh usually means nothing good.

"That I am not sure of but he obviously recognizes your voice, just remember he's still weak, and waking up from a coma isn't like waking up from a good night's sleep, the brain needs to slowly wake up and that can take time and happens in stages. Nurse Lauren will be around tonight if he does respond to anything else or opens his eyes, otherwise I will be back in the morning. Just keep talking to him. He could wake today, tomorrow, next week. Everything is in his hands now." She picked up Jamie's chart and wrote a few quick notes before smiling at the relieved family members leaving the room.

All six of them sat around Jamie's bed for hours taking it turns talking to him, they reminisced childhood memories and family gatherings. Joe and Danny had taken their pain medication and were dozing in the chairs uncomfortably. Mary leant in closely to Frank so she could speak quietly without disturbing them and where Linda and Henry could also hear. "They look awful," Frank said monitoring his two boys. Mary nodded.

"I know, they need to be comfortable in a bed and resting, not sat upright in a chairs, but I don't think we're going to be able to convince them to leave," Linda said keeping her voice quiet and looking with concern at both Danny and Joe.

"Then we don't convince him, we tell them." Frank sounded stern. "We'll tell them to go home tonight, Me and Linda willl take them back to the house and stay with them, you and Erin can stay here with Jamie and if anything happens call me, Danny can put his legs up in bed for a while, Joe can rest. They won't admit it but they both need to sleep properly so they can heal." Mary stood up, she walked over to both here son's tapping them on the shoulders. Joe winced adjusted himself in the chair, Danny sat up more in his wheelchair. Joe and Danny were sure they knew what this was about due to the look on all of their faces.

"Nope." Danny answered her look.

"Uh uh." Joe countered.

"Just for a few hours, your dad will call if anything happens, you're going to be no use to Jamie when he wakes up if you're exhausted and in pain," She said wisely putting her hands on her hips. They both knew she was right, but he had waited all this time to see his brother and then he had walked in and found him in such a vulnerable state they both couldn't just abandon him again.

"I mean it you two." Mary ordered.

"Just a few more hours mom okay?" Joe was never the one to give his mother a hard time. Mary thought long and hard.

"An hour."

"Come on ma" Danny pressed.

"Danny hush, you need rest," Linda joined in.

Mary couldn't resist the pleading look in her boy's eyes, but she knew it was the right decision for their own health. They all had sat almost silent for the past 50 minutes staring attentively at Jamie, wanting to notice any faint movement or sign that Jamie was coming back to them, but nothing had happened, they all had stayed worryingly still. Joe and Danny noticed it was 5 minutes till they had to leave, Joe slowly edged himself to his feet, Danny stretched in his very uncomfortable wheelchair. They both knew he needed to sleep, he trusted their mother to call if anything happened but leaving Jamie in such a vulnerable state was hard Frank walked over to his youngest and told him how much he love him and that he'll be back, Danny also said his goodbyes last one was Joe, he walked over to Jamie's bedside and reached down touching the top of Jamie's hand "Danny, Dad and I are going to go get some rest for a few hours, but Mom and Erin are going to stay here with you, and we'll be back in the morning Jamie." He tapped Jamie's hand gently, and was about to walk away, when something caught his eye, he looked down at Jamie's hand. Jamie's index finger slowly moved,

"Aye guys!" Joe yelled he stared down intently, afraid to even blink in case he missed it again. "Jamie's moving!" Danny returned to his side and watched Jamie's whole hand began to slow ball into a fist and as he looked up at Jamie's face he could see his eyelids slightly flickering. They both could feel their heart pounding and his eyes burning from refusing to blink. Mary and Frank had both rushed to be at Jamie's side, praying to see any kind of movement.

"Jamie sweetie." Mary begged the Reagan's were now staring down at Jamie. Linda ran off to grab Dr. Wilson or nurse Lauren. Frank's hands were shaking as he slowly picked up Jamie's hand and clearing his throat said nervously "Jamie…. squeeze my hand if you can hear me."

 **TBC!**

 **Will Jamie wake you next chapter? Review and tell me what you think. Thank you all for the review's and likes! They mean a lot!**


	5. Chapter 5

Frank held his breath as he looked down and then he felt it, Jamie squeezed his hand, it was gentle and weak but it was there. Frank looked around at his family smiling faces and smiled back at them.

Frank still held Jamie's hand as he spoke to him, his voice quiet, "Jamie can you open your eyes," he looked at Jamie pale face bruised face. He waited about thirty seconds before asking again, "Jamie, try and open your eyes." Still nothing, Frank sighed, the excitement from Jamie squeezing his hand quickly fading.

"It'll probably take him a while honey," Mary said sensing Frank anxiousness, "Jamie has been unconscious for a while."

The Reagan's turned around as they heard the door open and Linda walked in explaining to Doctor Wilson that Jamie had squeezed Frank's hand. Doctor Wilson walked over to the opposite side of the bed, allowing Frank to keep a hold of Jamie's hand, she smiled. "I hear we might be making some progress," She said as she walked over to Jamie. She took out a torch and shone it in Jamie's eyes and nodded as she put in back in her pocket, she took Jamie's hand. "Jameson, it's Doctor Wilson, you're waking up from a coma, can you squeeze my hand if you can hear me."

"He goes by Jamie. Maybe he'll respond to that." Joe corrected. Dr. Wilson repeated what she had just said, this time saying Jamie. The family held their breaths a lot longer watching Jamie's hand in Doctor Wilson's. All stood there waiting, but Jamie didn't squeeze her hand. She placed his hand back down at his side and walked over picking up his medical file, which was at the end of the bed. Doctor Wilson put the folder down and scratched her forehead thoughtfully. She looked over at Frank.

"Was it you that Jamie responded to at first?" The Doctor wondered.

"It was Joe." All eyes landed on him.

"Let's see if he responds to you." Dr Wilson suggested. "Joe, ask him to squeeze your hand, don't say anything else, just ask him to squeeze it."

Joe nodded and squeezing Jamie's hand gently hoping to get his attention asking him softly, "Jamie, squeeze my hand." He held Jamie's limp hand and watched and waited, about twenty seconds had passed but then Jamie hand moved unmistakably and squeezed Joe's hand and this time the grip was stronger. Frank smiled and letting out a sigh of relief. He looked over at Doctor Wilson who was also smiling.

"J." Joe called with tears in his eyes.

"These are great signs just keep talking to him. And if anything else happens just come a grab me." She grabbed his chart, leaving the room. Joe still had Jamie's hand in his.

"I have to call Erin." Mary announced exiting the room.

"Come on Jamie." Danny's voice broke barely above a whisper. Frank walked over to the other side of the bed and took Jamie's hand, trying so hard to keep it together in front of his family.

"Great news. Erin will be here in less than an hour." Mary smiled interrupting.

"Wait you don't still think we're leaving mom?" Danny questioned.

"Yes, you guys still need rest-"

"Mom don't you see Jamie is waking up? we can't go now." Danny interrupted. Danny looked over at Joe, Joe eyes were still set on Jamie, Jamie's hand still in his.

"Maybe we should go Danny, you know?" Joe suggested.

"Wha- Joe did you not just see what happened. We can't abandon him now." Danny Frustration clear.

"It's only for a little while Danny!" Linda scolded. Danny rolled his eyes and took a few breaths, his eyes landed back on Joe and Joe still had his eyes on Jamie.

"Alright let's go." Danny announced. Frank kissed Jamie on his forehead followed by Danny and then finally Joe.

"We'll see you in the morning." Frank told his youngest son. The three men along with Linda left the room. Mary was surprised to see how quick her husband and sons left. She took a seat beside Jamie's bed and held his hand, she spoke to him till Erin arrived 30 minutes later.

"He moved?" First thing Erin said rushing in putting her purse and a bag of takeout food.

"He did." Mary said proudly.

Arriving back to their childhood home in Bay Ridge, the car ride was quiet Joe and Danny sat in the back, looking out the windows like kids on a field trip, pulling into the driveway, putting the car into park, Frank looked into the rear view mirror at his sons, he gave a sigh and opened the door, Linda looked over her shoulder to see her Husband and brother in law. She noticed all three men had lost color in there faces, especially Frank, she had no idea what he felt when he almost lost all three of his boys at once. Frank came from the back with Danny's crouches and helped him out the car. Although Joe was in a sling he was a lot more mobile than Danny was so he helped himself out the car. After they all made it into the front door, they were met with balloons and lots of flowers and more welcome home gifts.

"These all for Jamie?" Linda was desperate for a conversation.

"The majority. A lot of people from the neighborhood and friends from school dropped them off." Frank responded.

"I'm gonna go shower." Joe announced. Heading to the stairs.

"You need help?" Frank offered.

"Dad, I'm not a child i can do this." Joe answered embarrassed.

"Just put the shower mat down so you don't slip." Frank obviously concerned. Joe nodded and took off up the steps.

"I can shower down here, i have a beautiful nurse to help me out," Danny smiled looking at his wife." Frank's eyes widened uncomfortable.

"I'll get sleep upstairs." Frank said his good nights to the couple and went straight up the steps.

Mary and Erin were sleeping in chairs inside Jamie's room they both had fallen asleep talking all night to Jamie, reminding him of past family gatherings, birthdays Danny and Joe's high school and police graduation etc. Mary's hand still holding Jamie's she awoke to a louder breathing notion, she opened her eyes to see Jamie's heart monitor rhythm going faster.

"Erin, Erin!" Mary yelled getting Erin's attention.

"Jamie." Erin responded seeing her baby brother's bright blue but confused eyes open staring down at the both of them.

"Baby." tears came to Mary's eyes. "How are you feeling?" Mary asked, Jamie looked directly at them but he didn't seem to recognize them, he blinked a couple of times trying to get his eyes to focus, it took a couple of frantic blinks, his eyes finally focused he seen their lips were moving but Jamie didn't have the energy to try and listen to what they were saying, he felt his eyelids drooping down and then the voices that he was sure he recognized but couldn't remember got louder, he forced himself to open his eyes again and try and listen to what the they were saying he felt someone tugging at his hand and then squeezing it, and as the voices got louder he let his eyelids drop and let sleep engulf him.

"Jamie wait-" Jamie was gone again, back to wherever he had been for the past few days. Erin wasn't even sure if he was listening or could understand, and then his eyelids had slowly closed.

Mary sat back down into her chair. That was the first time she had seen her son's eyes in a few days and he didn't seem to recognize her.

"Did he know it was us? How long was he awake for?" Mary asked her daughter.

"He was staring directly at us, he had to of known it was us right?" Erin responded.

"Why did he say anything to us?" Mary asked disappointment heard in her voice.

"At least he opened his eyes right? Dr. Wilson said it's suppose to happen in stages." Erin reminded.

"Yeah you're right let me contact the rest of the family and find the the Doctor." Mary released Jamie's hand checking her phone for the time, it was 6:07, she stood up stepping outside to make the call.

 **TBC**

 **Sorry i haven't updated in awhile next chapter in a day or two! Please L/R I don not own blue bloods**


	6. Chapter 6

Frank jumped up answering his phone on the second ring. "Mary is everything okay?" Frank said pretty loud in a panic which he kinda regretted because he didn't want to wake anyone up. "He did?" tears came to Frank's eyes as Mary explained. "We'll all be there soon. I love you guys." Frank ended the phone call. Frank sat up fully in bed, he looked over to his dresser which sat a photo of his mother, he prayed to her the night before to send Jamie back to them as soon as possible, he believed she had to of been listening.

* * *

Dr. Wilson had been in the room examining Jamie, as far as she could tell his condition and recovery time has been phenomenal, opening his eyes was a big step in the right direction.

"How is he, Doctor" Mary asked.

"He's Great. his vitals are looking fantastic, his ribs are setting correctly, his lung is healing just right." She continue writing in his chart. "Although." Mary's and Erin hearts skipped a few beats. "When he fully wakes he'll be in a significant amount of pain. So just as you came and got me this morning, do it again." She smiled she gave him some more morphine, and left the two.

"I don't want him in pain Erin." Mary mentioned in a light sob.

"It's healing pains, Mom. I think after everything is fully healed he'll be back to his old self, playing basketball, baseball." Mary nodded in agreeance.

"I suppose you're right." She sniffled. "Shouldn't you give Jack and Nikki a call?" Before Erin could answer. Frank along with Henry, Joe and Danny entered the room.

"Bearing gifts I see." Mary hugged Frank.

"Yup Coffee and Breakfast."

"By breakfast they mean bagels." Erin added.

"Excuse us sis, not everyone is on a supermodel diet" Danny ottered. Joe laughed a bit placing the bag on the table.

"That's funny Joe?" Erin hissed.

"N, no, I wasn't laughing." Joe gulped. His sister and mother were the only two women in his life and when they sounded mad, Joe went running.

"Good." Erin respond. Danny mouth dropped.

"Joe still scared, of big sis huh?" Danny Joked.

"Shut it Danny." Joe sneered.

"Hey where's Linda."

"She had to work." Danny answered. "So the kid opened his eyes this morning?"

"Yup." Erin smiled looking over at Jamie. "His head still had that white bandage wrapped around it, and he seemed to be sleeping peacefully. "His eyes were as blue as ever."

"Did he say anything." Henry added to the conversation curious.

"I don't think so, mom woke me up but all he did was stare, he didn't say anything." Erin responded.

"Oh." Danny said, Joe felt exactly what Danny did.

"Why Oh?" Mary Wondered.

"Just what if he doesn't remember us."

"He does Joe, Don't say things like that." Joe and Danny had the same look and feeling.

"Will you both stop it." Henry scolded. It broke into a medium argument in the room. They all tried to keep their voices down but it didn't really help. They began to be so loud the occupants walking through the hallway can hear.

"Will you all hush." Frank boomed. "If Jamie remember us or not we won't know until he wakes up but until then keep your thoughts to yourselves."

"I remember you guys." a soft voice that hadn't been heard in nearly a week remarked. Everyone's skin crawled turning round and seeing Jamie's eyes open, looking at them.

"Sweetie." Mary rushed to his side followed by Frank. Erin went right away to get the doctor.

"Jamie." Henry muttered.

"Do you feel alright?" Mary asked, gently holding his hand.

"Jamie." Doctor Wilson greeted. "How're you feeling?"

"My side really really hurts.." Everyone wince at his reply.

"Okay I'll give medicine to help with that, do you know where you are and why you're here? It's okay if you don't."

"The hospital, what-, I don't know what happened." Jamie said in a minor panic.

"You're in a hospital, calm down Jamie Okay? but can you tell me who these people are?" The true test of his memory was about to show.

"Mom, Dad, Pop's. Uhhh." He paused for a second. Dr. Wilson nodded encouraging him to go on. "Erin, Danny and Joe." Jamie pointed to each of them, a heavy weight lifted off all their shoulders. "What happened to you two." Jamie shouted as loud as he could after gauging his brothers conditions."What- what happened to your leg? And your arm?" Jamie asked panicking. He regretted that yell because they all watched him wince in pain,

"Calm down son." Frank laid a hand on his shoulder, Mary heart shattered.

"We were with you, remember the Jets Game." Danny said softly. Jamie stared at the wall trying to remember but everything was a blur.

"You were in a car accident a few days ago." Dr. Wilson eased on him, His eyes widened in shock.

"Can I have some water please?" Jamie asked in discomfort, the whole situation not making sense at all.

"I'll be right back with that." Dr. Wilson announced

"Joe, Danny. Are you two okay?"

"Are we okay? We're not the one lying in a hospital bed." Danny smiled to Jamie. Dr. Wilson return with the water Jamie asked for.

"So what happened." Jamie asked, finishing his slip from the cup.

"Well we were in a car accident." Joe begun.

"Okay, I got that."

"And we were hit by a drunk driver. I broke my leg and Joe got a concussion and a dislocated shoulder." Danny listed.

"And I'm guessing I hurt my side." Jamie tried to put the pieces together.

"Well a little more than that." Mary played with the strap on her jacket. Jamie just looked on confused.

"You actually had four cracked ribs and fractured two. And you had a bruise and swollen brain, you've been in a coma for the past week." The doctor finished.

"A co-coma?" Jamie lifted his hand feeling the bandage wrapped around his head. Joe stood up a left the room quickly. Jamie was surprised at Joe's departure. "What's today date?"

"November 18, the accident was on the 11th."

"Well okay, I think that's enough for right now." Dr. Wilson placed Jamie's chart on the table. Jamie, needs to rest.

"I'll see you kid." Danny kissed Jamie on his forehead, "I love you." Crutching out the door after Joe.

"I'll be right outside, okay sweetie." Mary took his hand. He wasn't a fan of all the affection they were showing, But if he had been in a coma for a week like the doctor told him, he understood.

* * *

Meanwhile Danny crutched down the hall in search for Joe. he basically looked in Every waiting room on the Pediatrics floor. He finally came across a double door that led to a garden. He crutched in spotting Joe across the courtyard, his back to Danny.

"You know this Courtyard is for kids who are too sick to go home, They wanted them to feel the outside again so they built it." Danny was surprised with what Joe had just said. "I read the plaque that was by the entrance." Danny sat down beside Joe on the bench. "I sat here and I wanted to cry, cry for them, for Jamie. No child should be here."

"Joe.." Danny began.

"But I couldn't cry I've cried every tear that I had over the past week. I thought I was getting better I didn't feel like it was my fault anymore, at least not like I did a few days ago."

"It's not your fault." Danny reminded. Joe scoffed, having yet to make eye contact with his brother, he instead just stared forward.

"Did you see his face when Dr. Wilson said he was in a coma-"

"He was in shock."

"Because of me," Joe raised his voice. "Don't you get it Danny?" Joe finally meeting Danny's eyes. Joe's eyes were empty and filled with pain. "Whether you realize it or not I was driving I was in control and I let that lady hit the car and hurt Jamie. You can sit here and tell me all day that i couldn't of done anything, because I know deep down I could have and if you were in my shoes you'd feel the same." Joe turned back forward. "Just go Danny."

"I'm not leaving you Joe. You're right if was the one driving I'll be feeling exactly what you are right now. The guilt, regret and remorse, But I can't let you sit here and drown in your sorrow because you wouldn't let me. You're a great big brother to Jamie all the times that he wasn't feeling good or even when he fell off his bike and hurt his elbow, if he was scared or whatever it was, he ran to you. Not me but you. Everything that happened last week wasn't intentional and you know that but I think you can't admit it."

"Of course it wasn't intentional Danny." Joe tone was Irritated.

"Okay and if you can admit than why can't you admit that what happened wasn't your fault."

"It's not that-"

"Easy?" Danny finished for him."Maybe it was intentional, you're sure in the hell acting like it." Joe stood up walking off again."Soon you'll realize that running away won't solve anything." Joe stopped half to the court yard doors. He closed his eyes and wince, Danny's words had just added more fuel to the fire. He continued on his path out of the courtyard.

* * *

 **TBC So Jamie is awake! And just when Joe was getting better, he might've gotten worse. Please review! Don't forget about my story. Updates soon. I** _DO NOT OWN BLUE BLOODS_ **Suggestions always welcome.**


	7. Chapter 7

Shivers ran through Danny body. His breathing a lot faster and louder. He couldn't believe he had said that, But he felt it was something that needed to be said. "Danny. Where's Joe?" Danny turned around meeting his father and mothers glance.

"He was just here... He ran off." Danny turn back forward. Frank noticed that look and then his eyes the moment he gave it to him.

"What did you say." Concern in Frank voice

"I don't know.." Danny said barely above a whisper.

"Danny.." Mary's voice meaning the same concern.

"Told him that running away isn't going to solve anything." Right when Mary opened her mouth to responded. "And then I said maybe what happened was something he intended too."

"Excuse me?" Mary tone was furious.

"Why would you say that." Frank voiced boomed. Danny closed his eyes.

"He was so quick to say what happened wasn't Intentional and I believe him there's no questioning that but what I don't understand is why he can't say what happened wasn't his fault."

"You are not his Psychologist Danny." Frank was blunt.

"You know exactly how Joe is feeling, he feels like the sky is falling and it's all his fault and what you just said, just gave him confirmation. You better hope we can fix this Daniel." Mary stormed off. His mother saying his real name confirmed to him that he messed up. Frank took a seat next to his oldest.

"Save it Dad, I know" Danny agonized.

"No you don't. I don't think you do, What you just said probably and most likely just did, destroyed your brother."

"The hospital psychiatrist explained it to us, He can't control the guilt, Sometimes it gets so bad people need to be admitted to mental hospitals to help with their grief. And with you saying that it was intentional, to him whether you meant it or not just as your mother said confirmed it to him because now he believes deep down that you believe that and you were the worst person to say because you were with him in that car."

"I'm so, so sorry Dad." Danny buried his hands into his face. "I never met to hurt him, Things were going so great I thought we were past it." Danny cried. "I never meant to say it at least not like the way I did."

"It's not what you say, it's how you say it Danny and this wasn't a good time." Frank put in arm around him holding him tight. Danny was 26 feeling like he was 5 years old In his father's arms crying like a baby.

Mary and Erin searched the entire pediatrics floor end the main floor lobby Joe was nowhere to be found after a while Mary stopped placing her hands on her hips exhaling loudly.

"Mom I know Danny could be a jerk but I know he didn't mean to hurt him." Erin mentioned.

"Oh please." Mary scoffed.

"You know Danny you know the love he has for all of us he would never just hurt us and I'm not sitting here making excuses for him, I know what he said was wrong."

"It was beyond wrong Erin. Joe is devastated."

"Yeah and so is Danny."

"Let's just go back and see Jamie. Joe probably just went for a walk to clear his head."

* * *

Entering the room Jamie sitting a little higher than he was before watching TV. "Hey Jamie, where's pops." Erin greeted.

"I asked the nurse for food and Pops told her no and he left to go home to make me something. He said he'd be back soon" Mary cracked a smile. Few years back when Frank's mother Betty was sick in the hospital Henry would only leave her side to go home and sleep and to cook her meal's because he didn't trust the lousy hospital food.

"Did you by any chance see Joe leave with him." Mary asked, Taking a seat beside her baby, whose eyes were set on the TV.

"No I haven't seen Joe since he walked out earlier." Jamie's eyes met his mother's "What's up with him though?" Mary and Erin simultaneously met eyes, Not really too sure if they should tell Jamie yet. "What?"

"Well." Mary's decision was made. "Joe is going through things right now." Jamie's blue orbs filled with confusion. "Sweetie Joe is going through something that is called excessive Guilt it's a disorder which a person is having extreme remorse over things that wasn't their fault.

"Joe is suffering because of the accident?" Jamie replied, his response tone was filled with pain. Mary nodded confirming.

"He's seeing a psychologist and she's helping him get through it." Erin responded.

"But it's not his fault." Jamie's eyes filled with tears threatening to fall. "It's who ever hit us, it's their fault." tears fell, Mary used her thumb whipping them away.

"I know sweetie."

"Where is he?, I need to talk to him." Jamie begged.

"We don't know he could be with pops."

"I don't want him to feel like this." Jamie cried to his mother.

"We know sweetie. We know."

* * *

Joe was on the subway, He didn't want to return to his father's house instead he headed back to his apartment. After getting off the subway he headed out onto the street and stopped by at the Neighborhood local Bodega. His arm was still in a sling, so pushing his cart, shopping for items was a bit of a struggle. It's felt like every aisle he entered he was getting sympathetic looks, He did his best to ignore them.

"Joe?" he spun around.

"Angela." He smiled. "What are you doing here?" She lifted her grocery basket.

"This is my local market, are you cooking tonight or something." Angela wondered.

"Oh no," Joe laughed in a awkward way. "I'm just picking up some TV dinners." they both chuckled. "You?"

"Just picking up some popcorn. How's your family?"

"Great," Joe lied.. "Jamie woke up today-"

"Oh gosh, Joe that's great I'm so happy."

"Yeah thank you. Seeing his eyes and him up and talking meant a lot."

"It should, that's amazing."

"So what's going on with you." Joe wondered.

"Everything's good," she exhaled in relief. "I actually just moved into this neighborhood not to long ago." They both finished checking out.

"Really? I live a block from here."

"If you don't have plans, maybe we can watch star wars movies, I just rented some." Joe facial expression was pure surprise at her invitation "Actually-"

"No, no I want to, you can come over to my place if you like."

"I'd like that." She smiled. The commute to Joe's apartments was short.

"This is a nice place Joe." She walked in. "You have like a perfect view of the city."

"That's what living on the 9th floor can get you, although moving furniture up here was a hassle." Joe finish putting his groceries in the fridge, "Can I get you something to drink.

"I bet and a water please." She continue to observe his apartment. "You're pretty neat guy." She looked on the tables, at the hardwood floors, Wasn't a typical guys apartment, but then looking on the walls at all the football and baseball memorabilia that quickly changed.

"I try to be." Joe smiled. He handed her a water bottle, sitting down sofa. "I honestly don't remember it being this clean in here." Joe replied removing his sling. He was only to wear it when he felt pain.

"Mommy come over and clean up?" He looked down at his phone he had miss calls from nearly everyone.

"Straightened up.. Maybe." Joe laughed. "So I never asked you what inspired you to become a Shrin- Psychologist." He corrected himself. She playfully squinted.

"Good catch Reagan" Angela squinted playfully "And honestly I don't know." She sat down on the other end of the sofa. "I wanted to help people. Yeah we have doctors and nurses and police officers, " She pointed to Joe. " firemen. But I wanted to help people with the long battle they face after whatever may have happened."

"That's great. You're doing your job great because you help me, I was in a slump I'm still kind of in there but you've helped a lot. I've changed a lot." He was sincere.

"Thank you that means so much." her emotion in that reply.

"Uh the movie," Joe stood up

"On the counter."

Joe put the movie in pressing play returning back to the sofa this time closer to Angela.

* * *

"He's not here." Frank entered Jamie's room announcing.

"He could be back at home." Erin suggested.

"I didn't see him." Henry spoke.

"His apartment, it's the only place." Danny was sure.

"I'll be back then." Frank announced.

"Wait- wait I need to go along, I started this mess." Danny confessed, Frank nodded.

"What about me, I want to, too." Jamie added.

"Jamie you literally just woken up from a coma not even 12 hours ago, you can go anywhere." Mama bear Erin voiced.

"You can't go anywhere" Jamie mimicked her voice under his breath. She gave him a look, Eventually rolling his eyes and sighing. "Alright bye Dad, bye Danny." Disappointment in Jamie's voice.

"Hey kid, we'll get Joe and bring him here, okay? You just focus on getting better so I can kick your ass again on the court."

"Yeah right." Danny laughed laying other kiss on Jamie's forehead. "Ughhh, will you quit it!" Danny laughed when Jamie squirmed.

"Just sit here and have Pop's tomato soup and will be back before you know it."

"Never took you for a Star Wars guy Reagan."

"Me? Why's that?"

"I don't know, When I first met you you seemed vague very self-centered but then I remember what you were going through, I didn't know if that just how you were or the grief talking, But I was wrong you're very sweet and nice but you were most definitely a tough nut to crack… Wasn't a chance in the world I'd take you for a Carrie Fisher fan. "

Joe chuckled. "Yeah sorry about that, I was a different Joe."

"I like this Joe, the sweet, kind and caring.."

"This Joe likes you too." After a brief laugh they both met in a deep stare. His eyes never leaving hers. They slowly went in for a kiss, Before they could, three knocking bangs were heard at the door. Their lips were centimeters apart.

"Joe, Joe are you there?" Danny's voice loudly shouted. Angela immediately recoiled from Joe.

"One sec," Joe told Angela.

"Joe come on I just want to talk!" Joe pissed but did his best to play it off. He finally opened the door, Stopping Danny mid knock.

"Joe, man, I'm so sorry brother what I said was wrong and you didn't deserve it-" Danny explained. Joe looked up in horror seeing his father in the back.

"It's fine Danny, really it is. I'm okay now."

"No way Joe.. what I said was horrible and I didnt mean it-"

"Don't worry about it." Joe was closer to shutting the door.

"Why are you being so weird." Danny noticed.

"I'm not-"

"And where's your sling." Frank also noticed.

"Can we come in?" Danny pushed past Joe.

"Sure." Joe answered but Danny was already inside.

"Oh. I- we didn't mean to intrude," Danny seen the brunette on the couch.

"No you guys didn't, I should actually get going…. long day tomorrow." She quickly grabbed her purse from the table.

"I can walk you home." Joe offered,

"No it's fine, I live like two blocks away. I'll see you later, you guys too." A silhouette followed by a door slam was all that was left.

"We had no idea." Frank was apologetic.

"It doesn't matter now." Joe sat back on his sofa. "I appreciate your apology. Danny."

"Yeah." Awkward quietness filled the room.

"I saw her at the Bodega, We talked a little bit, she rented a star wars movie and came over. Nothing happened." The look in their eyes said it all.

"That's your business son." Frank responded.

Danny quickly changed the subject, "Jamie wants to see you… Like really bad."

"He does?" Joe uttered.

"Yeah," Danny sat, "After the whole thing ended, Mom told us he was crying-"

"Crying?!" Joe was shook.

"Yeah, he wants to see you son." Frank Acknowledged. "It hurt him to know that you felt that way and Mary said he just broke down." Frank explained

"Sheesh." Joe was shocked.

* * *

 **TBC BIG THINGS TO COME. please review, They inspire me to write faster. Thank you all :)! And please remember I'm not trying to write to win an Emmy, It's all honestly for fun.**


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